Isn’t Life Hard Enough??

Simply Shawn N Jenn Disclosure

We as moms have it tough.  In fact, while many non-moms won’t agree, I would say that we have the toughest job that there is.  We are completely responsible for making sure that our children are well cared for and that they have everything that they need in order to grow into healthy and successful adults.  One thing is for certain, mom bashing needs to end.

I don’t usually make posts about this stuff but lately there seems to be more and more mom bashing from moms who are supposed to be on our side.  Seriously, if you can not stand up for other moms then how the hell do you expect us all to make it through the day.

Earlier this week, a Florida ICING store manager was caught mom bashing in the worst way.  She posted a picture of a mom babywearing her child and then blasted her for her choices as a mom.  I personally do not feel that the mom has a need to defend herself.  I have a 7 year old who I still occasionally wear sometimes when she is tired.  However this mom was wearing her 5 year old and had her toddler in a stroller.  The manager did a few things that I feel are completely unacceptable.

She posted a picture of someone else’s child online on social media without her permission!!!

That’s right, she took it upon herself to snap this picture which was distasteful.  However when she chose to post that picture on a social media website without the mother’s permission it went in a completely different direction.  I am seriously appalled by this happening and it freaks me out to think about someone posting pictures of my children without my permission.

However that is just the start of this.  She used very crass language and demeaned the mom for her choice.  Then she admitted to being a step parent.  Isn’t being a step parent hard enough?  Why would you ever question or judge another mom’s decision to raise a child.

Can’t We ALL Just Get Along!!

I will admit that I have a diverse group of mommy friends.  I have friends who are far harsher than I am.  I have a tough love approach sometimes that might seem harsh to other moms.  I have mom friends who vaccinate and those who do not.  I have mom friends who breastfeed and those who could not.  I have mom friends who babywear and those who choose not to.  I have mom friends who cloth diaper and those who think that cloth diapering would be gross.  I have mom friends who stay at home and those who work full time.  I have mom friends who feed their children only organic foods and those who often feed their children processed and/or fast food.  I have mom friends who pierce their infant’s ears and those who never would.  I have mom friends who had natural unassisted home births, those who have had c-sections, those who have had minimal medical interventions, and those who have had the full treatment with meds and epidurals in the delivery room.  I have mom friends who are devout Christians and choose to take their children to church each week and those who do not believe in God.

You know what the beauty of this is?  That we can all get along.  I do not have to worry about my mom friends chastising me for how we are different.  In a world that seems to pray on differences, my mom friends and I have found a support and love for each other based on the common grounds that we are moms.

So let’s rally together.  Let’s stand together as moms in love and admiration rather than choosing to chastise and treat one another poorly.  In a world where there are few things good going on, let’s be a light to one another and stand in the amazing sisterhood that brings us together as mothers.  We are all just trying to be the best that we can be and if we work together that is only going to help us all to be a bit more successful in the end.

Tough Parenting Decisions, How Do You Know What to Do

Simply Shawn N Jenn Disclosure

Since I am just a normal mom I will admit that from time to time I really struggle with how to handle something.  I am eager to do what is right for my children but I will admit that in the last few years I have gotten a bit lazy and have not been doing all that I should for them.  So I want to make the changes that are necessarily in 2015.  I am working hard to really focus on the things that matter most in life and those things are my children.  I am trying to be a good mom and to be the mom that I feel that I have been called to be.

Parenting is different for everyone which makes it so much harder to do it “right.”  I sometimes feel overwhelmed like I do not know what type of parent I want to be, what is right for myself or what is right for them.  When people said that parenting was tough, they were not joking.  I also know that parenting is the most rewarding thing that I will do in my entire life and I feel truly blessed to be able to have four amazing children…even on the hardest days.

I am not a religious person but I do believe in spirituality.  I am not a judgmental person and I believe that each person should choose the religion that they believe to be right for their family.  In my home I do practice mostly Christianity but I try to instill some of the virtues form other religions like teaching my children to focus more on giving and in taking care of those who can not care for themselves which I pull a lot from Buddhism.  I have studied multiple religions, read religious texts, and honestly tried to find my own way towards a more enlightened lifestyle.

I will admit that I have FAILED.  I have let so many things get in the way of where I should be and what I should be doing in the past few years.  I know that the only way to change these things is to start today and to really dig deep in trying to better the lives of my children and myself.  So this year I am going to be making some big changes and I thought that some of you might enjoy coming along on this journey with me.  I want to have open minded accepting children and the way to have that is to start with the things that are important at home first.  There are some changes that I need to make in my home and I know that these changes are going to have to start with me.

10 Things I Will Work on For My Children in 2015

**I will spend more time working on the things that are important.

I will admit that I get caught up in the world of social media.  I spend too much time on these things that in the grand scheme of life do not matter much.  Instead of being caught up in all of that I would like to take the time that is necessary to doing important things with my children.  Today I sat down and came up with a plan to help the younger three little ones learn 12 Bible verses in the next year.  Yes this is not a lot but it is something that I can stick to.  I also came up with 26 verses that Andrew will work on learning.

**I will start a routine at bedtime.

Bedtime at our home is often times chaotic and terrible.  In 2015 I want this to be something that I change.  So I am going to be working on being more consistent with a routine.  Doing baths after dinner, getting in their pjs, not watching TV, and picking out books.  We will also go over their Bible verse.

**I will be more organized.

Each evening while I am preparing dinner the kids will be responsible for picking up their toys and straightening their room.  I will make sure that this done before they head to bed.  I am also going to pick out clothes with them for the next day, have preparations made for lunches, and will know what is expected from school the following day and if there is anything that I need to do differently.

**I will be a more calm mom.

I am a bit crazy thanks to my severe ADHD.  In 2015 I want to try and calm down more because I know that when I stay calm with the kids better things happen.

**I will clean more.

I found a great chore chart that helps you stay on top of chores without being overwhelmed.  I am going to try and follow this chart for 2015 and see how much easier my life becomes.

**I will have reasonable expectations for the children.

I am going to sit down with my husband and come up with one weekly chore for the youngest and a couple for the middle two.  I will have a daily chore for the oldest.  I am going to work on sticking to this to try and keep our house in a more organized state so that I am not embarrassed when people drop by for a visit or someone wants to come over.

**I will de-clutter our lives.

Let’s face it when the kids have too much it is impossible for them to have fun.  I want to de-clutter our lives so that we can play more games and enjoy our time together more.

**I will have more fun.

I want to have more fun memories with my children.  I want to play more games and spend more time having fun with them all.

**I will be more consistent.

Consistency is a hard one for me and I am going to try my hardest in 2015 to be more consistent in all that I do.

**I will show more love and grace.

I feel that so much love and grace is given to me in many different directions of life.  I will start to show more love and grace to my children.  I will be more clear in directions and really work on teaching them their responsibility to our family.

While I know that I am not going to nail all of these.  They are all things that I am really going to make a conscious effort to do better with.  I am going to try and work to create a much better and happier home for all of us.